Style comes to West Virginia

Hearing the news that the "domestic diva" Martha Stewart had arrived at the federal prison for women in Greenbrier, West Virginia, I was reminded of the old Jimmie Rodgers song that was a big hit for Johnny Cash and has been recorded by many country artists He's In The Jailhouse Now. So, in honor of Ms. Stewart I have started work on new lyrics for the classic song.

SHE'S IN THE JAILHOUSE NOW

She's in the jailhouse now. She's in the jailhouse now.
(REPEAT)

Prosecutors said she lied, and evidence she tried to hide.
She's in the jailhouse now.

There was a gal named Martha. She didn't trade as she ought'a.
She thought she was a real high flyer.
But I found out today, she got locked up Friday.
They put her in the camp in Greenbrier.
She's in the jailhouse now.

LP Discography

Let me reiterate here what I have written elsewhere. I do not like Martha Stewart; or, to be more precise, I don't know Martha Stewart, but I don't like the idea of Martha Stewart. I believe she contibutes to making women high maintenance and that, in the view of this old bachelor, is not a good thing. More significantly, she is that most vile of creatures, the anti-capitalist capitalist. She profits enormously from the (relatively) free market system of America and backs political candidates and causes intent upon impairing or destroying that system. That's OK for a multimillionaire like Ms. Stewart, but where does it leave the rest of us who are still trying for our piece of the pie?

However, I do not think she should be in jail. I also do not think the government should be able to accuse anyone of obstruction of justice or hindering prosecution or just wasting the FBI's time unless they submit the underlying crime to a jury. Ms. Stewart stands convicted of telling lies to the FBI and altering her diary. Presumably this was to cover up insider trading, but the government was unwilling to take that matter to trial.

This travesty reminds me somewhat of the case of Ernie Preate who was the elected Attorney General of Pennsylvania a few years back. Federal prosecutors charged that his election campaign had used the mails (without the claim that the USPS was used there would not have been a basis for federal prosecution at all) in a scheme to circumvent state laws regarding campaign finance. The particular state statute was new, complex, unclear and had not yet been tested in state courts. Yet, the Feds were permitted to assume what Preate's campaign had done would have been found illegal. By piling on charges against the attorney general's brother, the Feds got Ernie Preate to accept a guilty plea in exchange for his brother's freedom.

In an earlier "corruption" case in Pennsylvania, the Feds launched a costly investigation that came up with one Democrat in the legislature appearing to have benefited. But that wasn't what they were after so they set up the Republican state treasurer R. Budd Dwyer as the fall guy. To this day, I do not believe Dwyer was guilty, but he found the deck so stacked against him that he committed suicide on live TV during a news conference in his office. He had hoped that this would spark interest by the press into the actual facts of the case. Instead, everybody just assumed that the prosecutors were right and that he was so overcome with guilt that he shot himself. No wonder Preate was afraid to take these people on.